You know you're in Africa when...

….you see cars parked in the MIDDLE of the street and on the sidewalks.

….you see a goat leg and half of a mouse while walking along the lake shore. Barefoot on the beach? I think not!

….you see a mouse skewered, fried, and intended for lunch. Yeah, no. I’m on a diet called “I’m not eating that.” Street food is always interesting...

….the package from your parents literally looks as if it went through the front lines of a battle in the 18th century.

….the power goes out right as you put your food in the oven to bake.

….random people call you “Madam” or even “Mom.”

….you spend a week at the lake, in the sun, and come back with a considerable tan. And then somebody comments on how white you are. #whitegirlproblems

….locals chase you down the streets trying to sell you their cards, paintings, pens, necklaces - anything, you name it.

….these same locals find out where you live and come to sell you their products.

….at the lodge you order toast and fruit for breakfast and it doesn’t show up in front of you for another hour.

….you discover that the reason the water tanks aren’t full is because the company that pumps the water found a dead body stuck inside and blocking one of the water pipes due to flooding that occurred when the cyclone came through. #nowords #boilboilboil

….instead of talking about the weather, you talk about whether or not you have electricity or water. 

….the people at the post office have never heard of the Federated States of Micronesia, and have no clue what to do with the letter you asked them to send there.

….local teenage boys lightly rub your arm because they want to know what white skin feels like.

….”luxury” means anything but luxury. Oops. That was a long bus ride.

….the air conditioning unit in your hotel room doesn’t work.

….every smile melts your heart. Unless it’s from a drunk person who wants you to go home with him. Then it’s kind of creepy.

….the week during rainy season it doesn’t rain at all is the week that you literally have no water. And by no water, I mean no water. No showers, no nothing. 

….you wake up to the dogs barking at monkeys in the trees in your yard.

….avocados fall from their tree and hit the metal roof right above your head, in the MIDDLE of the night.

….you can’t remember the last time you even saw a haystack.

….you have four weeks off from school for Christmas break. Can I hear an “Amen”?!

….the really loud music played on the bus continues throughout the entire night.

….the next bus plays ten songs over and over again for the eight hour ride.

….you can’t tell if people are so enthralled with you because you’re white or because your home country has a black president. #America=Obama #samething #noIhavenotmetObama

….you buy deodorant at the store and you can’t decide if it would be better to actually use it or not.

….you no longer have to make the choice between flushing the toilet or washing the dishes. You don’t have water for either.

….on the 30 hour bus ride to South Africa, the air conditioning doesn’t work and you practically die of heat, and on the way back to Malawi on the exact same bus, the air conditioning works so well you freeze the entire trip.

….you pay two rand to use a bathroom that is a complete mess and has toilets and sinks that don’t work.

….orchestra rehearsal gets out early because the power goes out.

….the Friday and Monday surrounding Easter Sunday are holidays = NO SCHOOL. Another “Amen” please!

These were collaborated from all the countries I’ve been to in Africa. I’m sure that not all of these are Africa-specific, but they are definitely true here!

Cheers!